Monday, December 3, 2012

Letter: Kamla passes with flying colours

Lately, several entities have been raising Cain for the Prime Minister to go. They comprise a mixed sample of the many creeds, races, economic and social sectors which go together to make up T&T. 

Given their known political aspirations, these entities have done a remarkably good job of getting and keeping their presence and views on the front burners of national and international discourse. 

This has at times led even some her own supporters and affiliates to fumble a bit by requesting openly, tacitly, or Freudan Style, that Kamla got to go. 

Queerly, they all fail to remember when calls or hints are made for an employee to go, industrial relations best practice and the laws of natural justice would automatically kick in to ensure a review of the employee's performance done to determine whether the employee really got to go. 

In Kamla's case, reviews of the type don't require a rocket scientist's intervention: Kamla is an avowed servant of the people; a straightforward check-off, using the Employee Appraisal Form, will do nicely. Shall we?

EMPLOYEE NAME: Kamla Persad-Bissessar
JOB TITLE: Prime Minister
DEPARTMENT: Government of Trinidad and Tobago
IMMEDIATE SUPERVISOR: We, the people.
REVIEW PERIOD: May 24, 2010 to present date.

RATINGS SCALES:

0 - 35%: Poor;
>35% - 45%: Fair;
>45 - 65%: Satisfactory;
>65% - 75%: Good;
>75% - 85%: Very Good;
>85% - 95%: Excellent;
>95%: Exceptional! And, unprecedented.

RATINGS FOR THIS EMPLOYEE:
1. Job Knowledge: 100%...Excellent

Comments: Not surprising, as this employee took up her appointment having gained vaster experience and having undergone more extensive preparation for the post than any previous or potential officeholder.

2. Work Quality: 98%...Excellent

Comments: The nature of the job entails arresting an inherited vortex so powerful, only a delicate balancing act can tackle it successfully. Despite one or two wobbles, the employee has maintained the required poise throughout.

3. Attendance/Punctuality: 92%...Excellent

Comments: Given the nature of the job, the employee has been able to stick to previously-announced time schedules with a much higher frequency than anyone previously holding the position, particularly during the time she had her sister performing the duties a Personal Assistant would have. Also, we, the people, waited thirty-five years for our second Olympic Gold medallist, Keshorn Walcott, who, as a result, now sits alongside Hasley Crawford, as a T&T class act. This employee has been a class act for more than forty-five years, so having to wait on her now and then is not an inconvenience at all.

4. Initiative: 99.5%...Excellent

Comments: The actual rating earned was 100%, but it was thought best to lop off half a point to prevent the employee from whooping too much.

5. Communication/Listening Skills: 99.95%...Excellent

Comments: See the comments under the heading "Initiative".

6. Dependability: 99.99%

Comments: See the comments under the heading "Communication/Listening Skills".

OVERALL RATING:

98.24%...Excellent! And, unprecedented!

CONCLUSION:

Employee, Kamla Persad-Bissessar, has passed this appraisal with flying colours! The ratings attained are unprecedented, but then, the employee has been shattering glass ceilings from her teen years.

RECOMMENDATIONS:

Employee, Kamla Persad-Bissessar, is fit to go for at least another fifteen years! So, you go, girl! Your detractors could stop right there, because you're not going a place!

Signed, on behalf of the people, by
Heston Corbie
69 Prizgar Lands, Laventille.
hestoncorbie@gmail.com

No comments:

Jai & Sero

Jai & Sero

Our family at home in Toronto 2008

Our family at home in Toronto 2008
Amit, Heather, Fuzz, Aj, Jiv, Shiva, Rampa, Sero, Jai