When the first round of matches was completed on Wednesday afternoon, we had the following statistics: Matches played: 16, Matches with a result: 10, Drawn matches: 6, Goals scored: 25, Excitement: zero!
And it certainly is not only I who is complaining - all the radio and TV commentators in South Africa are saying the same thing. So why is this happening?
Well, the learned commentators tell us that it has become more important not to lose your first game than to win it! That of course is so oxymoronic - that the coaches would strive first to draw (not to lose!) rather than to win (also not to lose!)—and risk losing anyway the matches they might have won.
And because the boring, negative play on the field gives us nothing to cheer, talk or argue about, the hottest topics of discussion are now balls and noise. Am I wrong?
If so, tell me of a great or really memorable moment on the field after sixteen games, and we have seen each team play? So let us talk about the balls and the noise.
FIFA’s balls provider comes up with a new ball for each World Cup. The new balls actually have a name, and the current incarnation is Jabulani.
When this ball was first introduced it brought howls of protest from the goalkeepers. The Jabulani was designed to “move”, that is, to swing through the air as it travelled goalwards. This would make goalkeeping much more difficult, but we, the fans, anticipated more goals, with the ball swinging away from the ‘keeper at the last second and nestling into the upper corner of the net.
Nothing wrong with that, we thought. But, either ADIDAS miscalculated, or secretly bowed to the goalkeepers lobby, because there are only three directions in which Jabulani swings: Up, Up, and Away!
Every shot goalwards from outside the penalty area has soared far beyond any possibility of scoring, or even testing the ‘keeper'. Not a single set-piece free kick has scored—most, like other kicks, go soaring far over the bar.
And this has become so expected that when Brazil took a shot against the North Korea, the ball soared as usual, but in this case had deflected off the forehead of a defender, the referee awarded a goal kick, not a corner, and not a Brazilian complained.
Indeed, even Diego Forlan’s tremendous goal against Argentina (OH Lord! How I could do this—it was South Africa—see what spell-check does not do!) as the second round of matches began was going into orbit had it not struck the South African captain and picked up the spin which caused it to dip into the net.
With few exceptions goalkeepers have been spectators to the matches. There have been almost no “great saves” from long shots, because long shots are all off target. Most saves have been made at the feet of the attackers.
Small wonder then that some ‘keepers have fallen asleep and allowed the ball to trickle through them into goal! And then there is the noise of the vuvuzelas! What a monotony of cacophony!
I know that is how they support the game over there, but it obliterates all of the other sounds—singing, chants, drumming and even the referees’ whistle. But I did not sign an e-petition to ban the vuvuzelas because I support our steel rhythm sections here even though some people object to our “noise”.
And in all this, I do not even have a team there which I support with my heart.
Maybe it’s a tabanca, because last time I went to the party with Cinderella, and this year Cinderella did not go, and I did not feel to dance alone. So I decided to support CONCACAF teams instead.
But on the opening day, South Africa stole my heart. The vibe, even coming through on TV, with the crowds, the Mandela effect, everything, caused me to switch from Mexico to the hosts.
But now the hosts are in trouble so I may be alone in the fete again.
The positives: It seems that South Africa is staging a successful event in terms of organization and logistics. The First World naysayers who kept looking for faults have been proven wrong, and the events are proceeding well with large crowds in attendance and support all through the country.
But if the football does not get more exciting, do not smash up your brand new 48” flat screen HD thing (I did not get one!). For good football pick up your family and get out to one of our lovely stadiums and enjoy the local Digicel Pro League instead!
This will be the beginning of your support for the Soca Warriors campaign—Brazil 2014.
Peter's columns also appear in NEWSDAY. For updated FIFA World Cup information click on the link on the right on our home page
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