That's how Independent Senator Gail Merhair explained herself in an interview with the Trinidad Express, following her vote with government to pass the bill to delay the Local Government Elections for another year.
Merhair was supportive of the Government and did not see any problem with the long delay in completing the reform exercise, which the government has said is the primary reason for delaying the vote.
Merhair said if all the Independent Senators had deliberately decided beforehand to vote with the Opposition this would have thwarted the wishes of the House of Representatives which is comprised of MPs elected by the people and any such attempt "may lead to a constitutional crisis by way of an inability to govern".
She told the paper, "I do not condone what the government is doing. Remember that, I said it is undemocratic and unbearable and it brings about a certain amount of anger not only within myself but within the people of Trinidad and Tobago...I had to act within the framework and the law that was before me.
"As an Independent, if I knew that I was going to vote against it I would have been setting a precedent now that would allow individuals to lobby the Independent bodies or the Independent bench so much so to actually thwart government policy."
Merhair said she had consulted a constitutional expert but declined to name the person who she said is "outside of the political system".
She told the Express, "I have no problem with people questioning me but I think it should, in fact, spur them on to realise how our Constitution is developed, how is our framework, what legislation is in place and if they want changes and if they want to see a better system then they need to do the right thing when it comes to voting and get their houses in order and get themselves in order and elect the right people to serve."
Merhair contended that the nine Independent Senators are not a party, do not hold a caucus and are expected to be balanced and impartial and to bring enlightenment to any debate in the Senate.
"I am not saying that there is going to be a time when I am not going to vote against, and I have done so, I have voted against certain government policies and I have come out quite vehemently and spoke about certain issues before," Merhair said.
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